I think I'm starting to hate my style
FFF its frustrating i cant be happy with anything i draw orz I look at it and immediately think " ew"
its stressful when i have commissions to do too B.D

I have been drawing...i've probably drawn 20-30 things i haven't posted here since my last submission. I always feel upset to submit things here...no happiness out of it 9_9

ah im rambling. but yeah if you have tips on how i could improve my style or something x.<
im desperate to get me to like my stuff

---
also i'm staying home this weekend which means i have time to finish the stuff I owe people...
which i will submit that orz

its official. I got a ride and everything is all payed for. Our cosplays arent done but we will manage...

just i litterally have been sitting on my butt since 8:30 AM working on school stuff...my time is so shot uff.

as for NYAF, I'll probably be there only saturday and some of sunday....last minute changes means missing the first day I guess orz... on the good side i dont have to take the Zoology exam early B.D

Once we finish our cosplays, hopefully tomorrow...being speedsewers + procrastinators like we are, I'll try to get a picture of us and post it for identification pourposes...
meaning youll find me easier if youre goin BD

cuz i wanna see many peeps like , , and _{artgod plzzzz}
as for the art trades i wanted to do, being my fault im slow with responses, I'll still do my half but if you wanna drop out (to the ones who said yes, specifically =vintage-aerith of who i failed to reply to) go for it. YOULL STILL GET THAT CHROSETTE +A+

uff.
I'll have to mooch off my friends colored pencil LOL.

as a note
I am a very akward person around people i dont know well. I tend to be quiet and studder or stumble over my words because i have hooooorible social skills. so if youre all smiely like "HEY I KNOW YOU HOWS IT GOING?" my normal reaction would be "e-eh o-ok i guess.........................."
dont take it personally lawl. im a slow thinker in social situations is all and horrible at smalltalk B>

-------
Also
Sorry for the sudden hiatus thing. I'm trying to fix it....I've been trying to fix it. Its not my inbox being too full or being too busy or anything like that. merely confidence issues and me comparing myself to everyone else above me.
what can i say, I havent felt good about myself in 10 years. its only natural

I'll get over it eventually like always B>

ahh Da i wanna give up on you.

all you do is make me realize how stagnant I am

*sighs* :C

my heart aches every time i log on |..D
then I just become apathetic. It's tiring.

so a possible hiatus...unless i pussy out like i do any other time... I'm just really down for the past....many weeks actually.
I'd rant about it but thats unnessesary 9_9

BBL

lawlawl _{amuria refrence}

UHM well...luck was on my side...the guy announced that report was due wednesday so...lawl all i have to do is type it up and im good to go orz

on the plus side, I have my desktop now...though my second monitor wont work :C *will find out why soon i hope*

I love my dorm room. its really cozy, see? [link]
and the view is also really nice [link]

uffjust unfortunately im still being kind of antisocial 9_9 sitting in here playing guitar hero all day with my roomate,

though i just made a new friend about 10 minutes ago LOL

but tomorrow classes start +A+... *prepares to face premed*
its kinda scary cuz everytime i tell someone "I'm in premed" they respond" 8u wow...y-youre smart"

._. lawl hopefully i will be

well I turned on my super hand-me-down laptop thats supposed to supply me for college...it worked fine before 9_9
but for no reason at all the p,=, and backspace randomly press and hold themselves....but when i go to press them they wont work....other bad news, I have to type a report this weekend....and im moving in tomorrow morning...in....about 4 hours ._.
FDSFS*upset*

that being said...im probably not gonna be on til sunday when my desktop gets taken to the school 9_9
i need to save up for a laptop now. joy ._.


warning journal and a short venting because old technology is starting to piss me off -A-

wish me luck. seriously *facepalm*
_{Premed had to go and be the most anal course too ;A;}